No surprise, I cried again.

This time, it wasn't that i miss anyone or something. I felt totally demoralizing over my doings in my workplace. How come I am not being more careful in what i am doing? I've trusted people too much and ended up in such a bad state. I guess I should have a 2nd thought and think of the consequences more.

Yep, should build up a thicker skin next time too so I will become bullet-proof like Boss.

Yep, with Photoshop, life is beautiful... (edited piece from below) 

Photoshop saves my day!!

Took this pic on the way to lunch with yongjia & Felix. I admit it is very badly taken as the patches below looked pretty dark. Bec someone invented photoshop, it really saved my day.

I love the clouds especially, it created a vivid difference between the sky and the earth and looking the shade of the blue gives u a soothing feeling.

This girl is such a b*tch!!! She leaned her body on the pole when it is so crowded with people and the poor aunty beside her cannot grab the pole to steady herself during the ride.

I know u guys are eyeing on her cleavage but excuse me, having a cleavage doesn't mean u can lean on the pole like this!! She is also so damn lazy to shift her big butt to the other side seeing there are lots of people trying to squeeze into the MRT and was yakking with her friend in terrible mandarin and cantonese. And I am bloody sure she ain't local as she has this terrible Malaysian-chinese accent.

I tried to grab the pole too when the train jerked alittle, my careless fingers rubbed against her snowwhite skin, she looked damn irritated and looked at me and turn away, her stupid long hair "piaked" against my hand..!!! I felt like using scissors to snip away her long ponytail!!! Grr... Do u know commuters are made up of 90% foreigners?? So if next time u met a rude commuter, pls stop to think that this aint a local..

Oh.. this is so gay.. Guess who is this? 

....... Duh.... 

Got Milk? 

Things u don't see in Star Wars the Movie... 

Take the quiz: "What Star Wars Character Are You?"

Padme Amidala
Congratulations. You are Padme Amidala, the beautiful young senator from Naboo. You were commited to civic duty from a young age and believe in democracy for all.

Alamak, cannot be la... :p

I have a new name for my boss... from today onwards, he shall be called "The AA Battery King"

He kept asking for batteries for his tape recorder, I bet he is listening non-stop on the voice recordings done at Helen Koh's party (her last day in office actually)...

Poor man, I can sense he missed his secretary very much.

Guess I have to order more batteries soon.

Alert!! Fashion addicts!!!

Blush! has a new boutique in Tampines Mall, having a storewide promotion $18 on each item!!!

Grab them before they are gone....!!!!

Ghee, i managed to get 2 bikinis and 1 bra yesterday. :)

An old newspaper cutting I found in one of the old files. Back then, I was still drawing for 1 of the column inSunday Zhoukan newspaper.

Watched Star Wars Episode III on Fri. In conclusion, Anakin fell into the dark side because he loved Padme too much??  

Sometimes, I hate myself being so sarcastic to the ones close to me. I'll try to change, pls give me time.

smses again... (from what I've recalled)

Me: Wah... sms to u in JB cost me 15 cents each...
Friend: mine is 50 cents each for replying to u..

Sorry friend, I dun really mean to sound so sarcastic to u sometimes. That's how I speak to my sis usually, we "suaned" each other like hell but we do care for each other. If the above really offended u, sorry loh... and u look/sound like my sis sometimes.

BTW, it is kind of busy to have too many friends... You can't concentrate and put equal attention to all.

I remembered I was playing The SimsTM last time, there was this message popped out when yr relationship with a friend/neighbour dropped to less than 50%, " Friendship is like taking care of a pot of plant, it will wither and die if u do not take care of it" It is hilarious, why is there a message that popped out during this game to remind me of such serious issue?

Have u ever realised how many friends u made and lost? They are often the same nos, Friends made = Friends lost. I've made new friends in my workplace, but lost few from my school days. I'll actually try to keep contact to those who contacted me in the 1st place, unless for very "special" reasons, I'll try to contact them instead.

How many friends have i kept in contact so far? There was a time when i called up an old friend (guy) and he was so surprised to hear from me. Kind of busy for some serious chit-chat too, from his shaky voice, i find he is feeling jittery during our conversation.

The night at an old classmate's wedding dinner was the worst. In fact no one (actually few la) asked me how I've been, how's things going on.... and whether I am still attached. They treated me like a stranger. It is the most boring wedding dinner I've attended and they were rejoicing that there wil be a next one soon. I think I better think twice of going, will probably end up boring myself to death.

(raine, if u r reading this, pls dun feel unhappy/or offended, just my personal feelings to my ex-classmates)

"I received a call last night. So surprised to hear from Simon (my ex, not SL) once again...

Me: Hello...?
Simon: Hello... Xinhui? how.. are.. u??
Me: Hah? Ok lo.. hmm, I thought u went back to Sibu? Why are u still calling me?
Simon: I came back to spore, din managed to pass 1 module (from his masters programme last time in NUS) so have to retake.
Me: So... how life's been?
Simon : I'm not be OK since, I am now in bad-condition, been a bad-boy since I came back, taking drugs like cannabis... ****, **** (I forgot all those drug names)
Me: Hah??? Why???????
Simon: Dun have to ask why.. would u mind lending some money to me, haven found a job since I came back, can't go back to Sarawak now, plssss.....
Me: NOOOOOOOOO....... Is that the reason u called? U better seek help from those rehabilitation centres.. "
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I woke up... Damn.. The above is just a dream i had this morning. I am feeling abit of sad and happy.. Complicated feeling.

BTW, he has graduated from his masters program since last year, remembered I attended his graduation ceremony with his parents. So how nonsensical this dream has been.... sounded so DRAMA...

Not only this dream, I dreamt I was with Prettyboy. It is so incredible because he is already attached and he said he wants to be with me. The dream is not what u think, just a plain-romantic scene where 2 people confessed their love for each other... BTW, I have only a slight crush on him, not really LOVE.

And he happened to call me just now!! <-- Nah... just asking for some contacts.

Weird dreams make u think over and over again, pretty hard to forget.

A thirst-quencher for the terrible-summer weather... 

My Pet Cat is missing..... (looks at the right-hand side column)

Anyone knew where is it? It was actually a counter to check on no. of visitors to my blog. I've not been seeing it quite sometime, wondered where it went... I think it left home bec I've not been looking after it since.

I've been neglecting my 2 terrapins too.. Few days ago, the male terrapin left his home and hid somewhere in the house. I guess he is getting tired of the small, confined space with his partner. It was found by my aunt, as she also helped me to change their water. It usually stinks after a few days with their **** and I hasen got the time to change water regularly. I guess it was the reason why he left home.....

I am planning to have a secret blog as I feel it is necessary to voice out my frustrations to somewhere no one will bother to look at, and preferably I shall keep my identity confidential for the time being...

Thinking... thinking.....

Some mins later in the starting of 9 May... :) 

BTW, my birthday is next Monday...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!!

Your Birthdate: May 9

Your birth on the 9th day of the month adds a tone of idealism and humanitarianism to your nature. You become one who can work easily with people because you are broadminded, tolerant and generous. You are ever sensitive to others' needs and feelings, and you are very sympathetic and compassionate. Your feeling run deep and you often find yourself in dramatically charged situations. This 9 energy always tends to give more that it gets.

What Does Your Birth Date Mean?

My reply to him:


Dear Simon,

I'm so sorry....
My deepest condolences...If u need help, a shoulder to cry on, I will not hesitate to lend u one.

And I am utterly sorry and barge into your life during your most sorrowest period . If it is the case, pls accept my most sincere apologies.

Be strong, OK?

Yours sincerely,
Xinhui

I do treasure friendship, so I sent him (SL) this email...



>-----Original Message-----
>From: Chua moon [mailto:moonflyer00@hotmail.com]
>Sent: Tuesday, May 03, 2005 2:55 PM
>To: simlsc@yahoo.com.sg
>Subject: Ooiiiii..... are u still in this world??
>
>Dear Simon,
>
>Din hear from u for long.. long time... Still busy??
>
>Well, just drop u an email to disturb you during your busy work schedule. I
>hope u are not overly busy with the NYP thingy.
>
>You see.. friends are like plants. You got to take care of them so they will
>
>not wither and die. Not sure what you are thinking now, maybe you will get
>to understand better once you are in the "university of working life". You
>will get to see more people with different walks of life and building your
>career in near future.
>
>Pls remember friends are supports to your future endeavours too....
>
>So start contacting your old friends!!!
>
>:)
>
>from MOON aka xinhui
>
>ooi... I am not trying to "court" u now, so dun worry. :)
>Just want to find out how's my old friend.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.

After a few days, here's his reply...



>From: "Simon Lee"
>Reply-To:
>To: "'Chua moon'"
>Subject: RE: Ooiiiii..... are u still in this world??
>Date: Fri, 6 May 2005 21:56:58 +0800
>
>Hi xinhui,
>
>Sorry for not replying for so long. My mother passed away 2 Sundays ago on
>24 Apr, and I have been settling a lot of affairs lately.
>
>I have not been consciously avoiding you, so don't worry, friend. It's just
>the past 2 months have been really sorrowful and stressful for my family,
>and I really have had no time for other things.
>
>simon
>



Oh mine... I am really very shocked.... I felt really so sorry for him and felt bad for "hating him" last time for saying such stuff to me in the sms. Can anyone tell me what can I do to make him feel better....???

Watched the "Kingdom of Heaven" last night with Lorraine.. haha... so much things I wanna rant abt the show... (i shall talk abt it later) No, u dun get to see this scene as it is horrendously cut away from the NC-16 show. :( 

My Birthday Wish List!!

Just in case u need to get something for my birthday...The item(s) i wish to get for my Birthday is/are:

1) Damien Rice CD album

An Irish singer/song writer who composes melodic music and has quite a distinctive voice. You may refer to his music clip here: http://www.warnerbrosrecords.com/damienrice/

I kind of "melted" when listening to his song "The Blower's Daughter"... Yes.. this song was from the movie "Closer" soundtrack. He has another nice song "Cannonball" from the movie "In Good Company" which was featured inside this album too!!

2) Some new clothes from "Little Match Girl"

I love the tops from this Japanese concept boutique in Bugis!

3)  Songs, albums you think it is nice

4) An aromatic massage

5) A candle-light dinner with Jay Chou

6) I'll be updating more as I come along...

Our New Pope, Joseph Ratzinger has something to say... 

This article was taken from http://www.thetrumpet.com/index.php?page=article&id=1373
Pretty interesting, pay attention to the last paragraph.

Coming German Pope?
May 2005

With John Paul II’s death, speculation over his successor grows. Could Joseph Ratzinger be a coming German pope?

Pope John Paul ii’s recent death has fueled speculation on who will be his successor. Although, officially, the Vatican cannot comment on the matter, insiders and observers are naming the major contenders.

The Trumpet has pointed out many times over recent years that the pope to replace John Paul ii will be an arch-conservative—and almost certainly the man to bring to fruition some of the most dreadful of end-time biblical prophecies.

Our June 2002 issue stated of the next pope: “Right wing he shall be, doctrinaire will be his mindset.” Relating how the present pope has increased the political power and diplomatic influence of the Vatican on the world scene—as witnessed by the Vatican’s hand in the fall of the Communist ussr and more recently the break-up of Yugoslavia—the Trumpet declared, “The next pope will enforce the spiritual power of the church!”

There is one powerful man within the Roman Catholic Church hierarchy who has the perfect credentials. It just so happens that he appears to be one of the primary contenders for the job: the ultra-conservative German Cardinal Joseph Ratzinger.

The Trumpet has often referred to the powerful position Ratzinger has held for the past 24 years. As head of the Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith, formerly the infamous Inquisition, he holds the most influential position in the Catholic Church under John Paul. The department he controls oversees moral and theological issues and is responsible for enforcing church doctrine—or fighting “heresy,” just like the old Inquisition.

Ratzinger has worked closely with John Paul for over 20 years to actively remove liberal elements from the church and to re-establish Vatican authority. “From the very beginning of his pontificate John Paul ii decided to systematically crush dissent by Catholic theologians and to marginalize critics so they would no longer stir up unwanted discussion within the church. With the appointment of Joseph Ratzinger as prefect of the Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith in November 1981, it became clear that this was official policy” (Carl Bernstein and Marco Politi, His Holiness).

In support of this policy, many cardinals who demonstrated liberal tendencies on doctrine were removed. The leadership of the Catholic Church in Latin America, for example, was basically replaced with men who toed the Vatican party line. Similarly, Australian bishops “were carpeted in the 1990s for allowing a church culture that was seen as too egalitarian and open to secular influences” (Australian, February 28). A cardinal hand-chosen by Rome was sent down under “to pull Sydney into line.” The pope also appointed conservatives to run liberal churches in numerous other countries such as India, Austria, Argentina, the Netherlands, Canada and Brazil (ibid.).

The appointment of right-wing traditionalists was not only to ensure conformity to church doctrine and loyalty to Rome, but also to guarantee the election of a similarly minded pope after John Paul has passed from the scene. Of the 119 cardinals who currently have a vote on who his successor will be, John Paul has personally appointed all but three. By stacking the deck with like-minded cardinals, the pope has ensured that his successor will be a right-winger who shares his conservative theology and morality. The Australian reports that, at most, only 30 of the 119 might be considered liberals (ibid.); the number is probably much smaller than this. Regardless, with just a two-thirds majority needed to elect the new pope, he will be a conservative. Not only that, but John Paul instituted a fail-safe plan: He changed the rules so that if there is any disagreement on a candidate, the new pope can be elected by a simple majority.

Eberhard von Gemmingen, director of the German-language arm of Radio Vatican, believes that Ratzinger is one of the most promising candidates. “In the conclave [the electoral body of cardinals who will elect the next pope],” he said, “he could very well receive a majority of votes during the first round of voting” (Der Spiegel, February 14). Ratzinger is popular and highly respected among cardinals from various parts of the world.

“To his detractors, Ratzinger is rigid and doctrinaire: to his admirers his firm hand guides the church along true conservative lines” (United Press International, February 25). Ratzinger’s candidacy for the papacy “is said to have wide support in the church” (ibid.).

In recent years he has toned down his hard-line image by being more reserved in public and has even at times issued liberal statements to soften his persona. “There was a stigma,” said one Vatican insider of Ratzinger. “He rises above that now” (Time, January 10).

Some church officials have thought that Ratzinger, 78 this April, is too old to be “pope material.” This however, could actually be one of his biggest advantages, according to Deutsche Welle (February 10). With the uncharacteristically long reign of the current pope, some in the church believe a “transitional pope” would be a good thing. Thus Ratzinger has the potential of pleasing both the conservatives, by virtue of his uncompromising commitment to hard and fast Catholic dogma, and those who oppose him, by the consolation that he could not remain as long in the post as his predecessor. It seems Ratzinger himself is using this fact to his advantage, saying if he were to become pontiff, he would be prepared “to give up the job after a few years” (ibid.).

In February, the bbc reported that the “destiny of Europe is preoccupying the Vatican.” Cardinals have complained of an “anti-Catholic inquisition” from a liberal element within the EU (February 11). With a mood like this, high-ranking Catholic clergy may see Ratzinger as just the man to solve the “problem.” Referring to the decline of Catholic practice in Western Europe, the March 5 Spectator pointed out that Ratzinger—who has been “forthright and fearless in confronting secularism and defending the orthodox teaching” of the Catholic Church—“sees clearly what is at stake.” As a Vatican official told Time, “The Ratzinger solution is definitely on” (op. cit.).

Certainly, the coming pope will be one for whom the “destiny of Europe” will be of prime concern. Seven resurrections of the war-mongering Holy Roman Empire are prophesied to occur in chapters 13 and 17 of Revelation. Six of these resurrections have already occurred. (Read about these in our booklet Germany and the Holy Roman Empire, which is free upon request.) The reason the identity of the next pope is of particular interest is that this man is likely to be one of the two most powerful leaders of the seventh resurrection of the Holy Roman Empire—an empire that will thrust the world into World War iii! As editor in chief Gerald Flurry has stated, “Over the past 1,500 years there have been six resurrections of the ‘Holy’ Roman Empire. Most of the time this empire revolved around Germany and the Vatican, along with Italy” (June 2000). The seventh resurrection, which is now in the making, will once again revolve around Germany and the Vatican. And a German pope may be just the man to bring the two together. Watch Joseph Ratzinger.

Terence, Edmund & Darren. Three of them belong to different job field. 

Exams Over

I’ve not blogged for a long time. I was merely putting up my pics in the Hello and some messages to inform my friends (who visited my blog) how I’ve been.

I guess I should start writing something since I’ve finished my Exam (Financial Management) on Tues and very free now… however very lazy to be out in the sun due to the scorching weather. OH…GOOD… I hear thunder and saw dark clouds now. Guess my praying for a storm worked!

The exam (FM) was tough. Jessica has been a great lecturer but I’m a lousy student. I felt grateful to her as she consoled me when she saw me in tears during the first few weeks of the terrible module. I have evidences that I studied for my exams!! (see photo of the revision I had with 3 uncles :P)

I do hope she can continue her lecture for the next module, Property Valuation but she was not specialized in that field. Her good friend, Andy came back to take the role…

I DUN LIKE ANDY!!! He doesn’t know how to teach and pretty irresponsible. I feel I am going to do very badly for the last module because of Andy. Even Terence (course-mate) suspects Andy has brain tumour or something bec he will suddenly forget what he was saying in the midst of the lecture.

Anyway, the next module (last one for Higher Diploma) will start soon on 10 May 05, right after my birthday. After that, I will have a long break before 1st Aug 05. May consider going for a short trip if money & time permits.